Laughter is contagious—sometimes even more than a sneeze! 😅 And when it comes to puns, the “plague” theme might sound a little dark, but it’s also full of wordplay opportunities. From medieval times to modern memes, plagues have always been a part of history and while the real ones were no joke, punning about them definitely is.
Here, we’ve gathered 270+ plague puns that are witty, creative and ready to spread some fun. Whether you’re a history buff, a science geek or just someone who loves clever wordplay, these puns will tickle your funny bone and maybe even “infect” your conversations with humor.
So, let’s mask up and dive into the humor plague—no vaccines needed, just laughter! 😂
Funny Plague Puns
· I’ve got a sick sense of humor—literally.
· When life gives you germs, make plague-ade.
· The plague really knew how to sweep the nation.
· I’m just here for the sneeze and giggles.
· Feeling down? Let’s spread some cheer-demics.
· Call me a germ, because I’m going viral.
· Plagues: the ultimate crowd pleasers.
· I’m not lazy, I’m just on quaran-time.
· Black Death? More like dark humor.
· The plague was history’s worst group project.
· They say laughter is contagious—guess I’m a fun-gi.
· Avoid drama, not germs.
· History really has a way of sick-ing around.
· The only plague I want is a laughter outbreak.
· You can’t spell pandemic without pun!
Medieval Plague Puns
· Knights feared swords, peasants feared sneezes.
· The Middle Ages were plague-d with problems.
· Jesters kept the court laughing—even in a plague.
· Castles were great, but not against rat attacks.
· The plague was a true dark knight.
· Peasants didn’t have Wi-Fi, but they had fleas-Fi.
· Serfs up! More like sneeze’s up.
· Life in medieval times? Sick and tired.
· Even the Blacksmith couldn’t forge a cure.
· The feudal system really crumbled under germs.
· Jousting with germs was a losing battle.
· Kingdoms feared rat royalties.
· The plague was history’s worst knightmare.
· Court jesters were the original meme lords.
· Who needs dragons when you’ve got plagues?
Read Also: 330+ Fracture Puns That Will Crack You Up 🦴😂
Rat & Flea Puns 🐀
· Rat-tastrophe incoming!
· Fleas don’t need an invite to the plague party.
· Call it pest control of history.
· That rat had a tail-tale ending.
· Fleas are just rats’ side hustlers.
· The plague was truly a rat race.
· Rat jokes always squeak by.
· Fleas had a bite-sized role in history.
· That rat’s career really peaked in the 1300s.
· Don’t rat me out—it’s contagious.
· Fleas: the original influenzers.
· Rat pun? It’s just a little cheesy. 🧀
· The plague was a true flea-for-all.
· History was ratty, but never boring.
· Fleas were the ultimate wingmen.
Quarantine Puns 🏠
· Quaran-teenagers had it rough.
· Locked up but still cracking jokes.
· My hobbies? Baking bread and avoiding plagues.
· Quarantine is just introvert heaven.
· Isolation is just me, myself, and Wi-Fi.
· Call me Netflix and Quill.
· Mask up, laugh out.
· Self-care is the new plague care.
· Quarantine: where naps are mandatory.
· Boredom is the real pandemic.
· Medieval quarantine = no pubs.
· Stay away, stay alive.
· Social distancing? More like plague dancing. 💃
· The cure to boredom? Puns.
· Lockdown and laugh on.
Black Death Puns
· The Black Death really left a mark.
· The ultimate goth event.
· It wasn’t a vibe—it was a virus.
· Dark humor was born here.
· Death was trending.
· A plague by any other name would still stink.
· Black Death? More like black comedy.
· The darkest humor has the brightest laughs.
· That era was truly death-defining.
· The plague was the first dark meme.
· Ring around the rosie = OG TikTok dance.
· The plague really cleaned up the charts.
· Death was the top influencer.
· The OG “unfollow” button.
· History went dark mode.
See Also: 300+ Asthma Puns That’ll Take Your Breath Away (Literally 😂)
Pandemic Puns 😷
· Pandemics spread faster than Wi-Fi.
· The only viral thing I like is TikTok.
· Germs have no borders.
· Flu fighters unite!
· Pandemic? More like pun-demic.
· Viral memes are the safe kind.
· Panic and pandemic rhyme for a reason.
· Covid had nothing on the plague’s PR.
· Germs: humanity’s worst collab.
· Viruses love the spotlight.
· Handshakes? Out. Elbow bumps? In.
· Pandemic humor is my vaccine.
· Catchy jokes are the only spread we want.
· History repeats—so do germs.
· Wash your hands, not your humor.
Doctor Puns 🩺
· The plague doctor’s mask was peak fashion.
· That’s one long nose job.
· Doctors back then winged it—literally.
· Trust me, I’m a plague doctor.
· Medieval PPE was chic.
· Beak performance award goes to them.
· Doctors gave the best sick burns.
· Laughter is my prescription.
· Stay sick? Not on my watch.
· Those herbs didn’t cure, but they smelled nice.
· Mask on, vibes strong.
· Plague doctors: history’s cosplayers.
· Bedside manner? More like graveside.
· Sick beats, sick patients.
· The cure? Comedy.
History Plague Puns
· History really sneezed all over Europe.
· The Renaissance was basically the plague’s sequel.
· Kings ruled, but germs reigned.
· History textbooks are full of cough drops.
· The plague turned Europe into a dark comedy show.
· Germs were the true conquerors.
· The only crown people feared was Corona. 👑
· The plague wrote its own history.
· Archives? More like sneeze-chives.
· Plagues were history’s biggest influencers.
· Who needs Shakespeare when you’ve got sneezes?
· The timeline was riddled with spots.
· The Middle Ages were sick. Literally.
· The plague didn’t ask permission—it just entered history.
· Lesson learned: always wash your hands.
Related Post: 360+ Arthritis Puns to Crack You Up (Without Cracking Joints!)
Modern Plague Puns
· Plague 2.0 would go viral on TikTok.
· Wi-Fi spreads faster than germs now.
· Imagine plague memes trending daily.
· Quarantine Zoom calls? A medieval knightmare.
· Social media is the new pandemic.
· Netflix would’ve cashed in big during the plague.
· DoorDash > medieval bread lines.
· Instagram filters can’t hide the Black Death.
· Siri, find me a cure.
· Amazon Prime could’ve delivered masks in time.
· Even medieval TikTok would’ve been cough-based.
· Twitter threads: 100% plague rants.
· History in 2025: still making pandemic memes.
· Spotify’s top hits? Cough Drops. 🎶
· Google search: “how to survive plague.”
Sneeze & Cough Puns 🤧
· Bless you? You’ll need it.
· Sneeze the day away.
· Don’t spread rumors—spread tissues.
· Achoo and you’re through.
· Sneeze-tory repeats itself.
· Cough jokes are contagious.
· Sneeze attack unlocked.
· Cover your cough like a boss.
· A sneeze is just a germ’s debut.
· Don’t cough on my vibe.
· Sneeze on fleek.
· History coughed up chaos.
· Every sneeze tells a tail.
· A cough is just a plague remix.
· Achoo-ly funny, right?
School & Study Plague Puns 📚
· History class is infectiously fun.
· My homework got quarantined.
· Pop quizzes? More like plop plagues.
· Germs were the first pop culture.
· Teachers love to spread knowledge—not germs.
· The plague was history’s group project fail.
· Studying medieval times = coughing up facts.
· My notes are contagious.
· Report card says: Sick performance.
· Exams = test-demic.
· Teachers wore patience, not masks.
· History test? I’ve got plague brain.
· Germs were the real teachers.
· School: the ultimate petri dish.
· Class dismissed, cough included.
Love & Relationship Plague Puns ❤️
· You’re my quarantine crush.
· Love spreads faster than germs.
· Catching feelings > catching plagues.
· You’re infectious—in a good way.
· Be my plague partner.
· I’m sick of loving you.
· Our love is viral.
· Roses are red, violets are blue, don’t catch the plague, or I’ll miss you.
· You’re my favorite fever dream.
· I’d mask up for you.
· Coughing fits, loving fits.
· Distance makes the heart immune.
· You’ve infected my heart.
· I sneeze you, I love you.
· Germs come and go, love stays.
Food & Drink Plague Puns 🍞
· Bread lines were the first fast food.
· Rat stew wasn’t on the menu.
· Quaran-tea time! ☕
· Plague soup: too viral to handle.
· Garlic bread was also medieval PPE.
· Apple a day? Too late.
· Wine was basically sanitizer.
· Cheese spread faster than germs.
· Cough-cakes for dessert.
· Plague diet = involuntary fasting.
· Soup of the day: cough broth.
· Stay toast-y in quarantine.
· Ratatouille: historically accurate. 🐀
· Eat, drink, be merry—for tomorrow, plague.
· Feasts ended in sneezes.
Science & Medicine Puns 🔬
· Germ theory wasn’t invented yet—oops.
· Microscope? Try mega-scope.
· Bacteria was the OG influencer.
· Viruses always cell out.
· Lab coats were plague chic.
· Handwashing: history’s best invention.
· Petri dishes > pet rats.
· Germs were doctors’ arch-nemeses.
· Microbes: small but mighty.
· Chemistry couldn’t cure history.
· No vaccines, just vibes.
· Biology class = plague flashbacks.
· The only cure was time.
· Science rules, germs drool.
· Viruses: tiny comedians.
Dark Humor Plague Puns 🖤
· Plague parties were killer.
· Six feet apart, or six feet under.
· Death was the ultimate influencer.
· Black humor = Black Death.
· The graveyard shift was real.
· Tomb with a view.
· Laughing through the coughs.
· The original deadpan humor.
· Death jokes never get old—just buried.
· Grim but grin-worthy.
· Medieval goth vibes unlocked.
· Killer comedy act.
· Death by laughter—best way to go.
· Dark times, darker humor.
· Humor survived where people didn’t.
Travel & Adventure Plague Puns 🌍
· Europe was on the plague map.
· Tour de germs.
· Travel ban? More like plague ban.
· The first passport: immunity.
· Rats rode free on ships.
· Plague had frequent flyer miles.
· Tourist attractions: cough castles.
· Souvenirs = fleas.
· Wanderlust turned into wander-must-stay.
· Ships carried more germs than goods.
· Adventure ended in infection.
· Pilgrims packed plagues.
· Germs never needed visas.
· Plague tours were all-inclusive.
· Globe-trotting germs never stopped.
Pop Culture Plague Puns 🎭
· The plague was history’s biggest blockbuster.
· Medieval Netflix: fireside storytelling.
· Plague memes would’ve gone viral fast.
· Flea market? More like germ market.
· Germs were trending before Twitter.
· Songs of the plague = ring around the rosie.
· The plague was breaking news.
· Medieval influencers wore masks with style.
· Broadway was just cough-way.
· Gossip spread faster than germs.
· Plague was the OG celebrity.
· Culture was contagious.
· Every story was plague-related.
· Drama was always infectious.
· Theater masks vs plague masks.
Survival & Motivation Plague Puns 💪
· Survive and thrive—mask up!
· Plague survivors were hardcore.
· Tough times breed tougher jokes.
· Every cough is a battle cry.
· Keep calm and cough on.
· Stronger than the sneeze.
· Survival humor is undefeated.
· If you’re reading this, you’re plague-proof.
· Germs can’t kill the vibe.
· Resilience is contagious.
· Medieval grit = survival kit.
· Laughter was always the best shield.
· Humor is immunity.
· Outlive, outlast, out-laugh.
· Even plagues couldn’t kill the punchline.
Conclusion 🎉
Who knew plagues could be this funny? From medieval rats to modern memes, these 270+ plague puns prove that humor really is the best medicine. Whether you wanted witty one-liners, historical wordplay or just something punny to share, now you’re fully “infected” with laughter. Spread the fun, not the germs! 😷😂
